I was your average girl. I lived in a small house outside of Charlotte, North Carolina. In a small town called Smallwood .That stood at about five miles northeast outside of charlotte. Smallwood was a quiet little town with the exception of the local Wal-Mart. Not much business seemed to take place there. It was a major change from the bustling atmosphere of city life that I been use to. I resented having to move and I resented even more going to a new school. I mean here I was. In a new town where I knew no one .It was a stressful feeling.
To further add to the stress. I was the new girl in a school were all the girls seemed to be alike. They were white, blond and beautiful .While I on the other hand was the combination of a suburban white father and an East Indian mother. Making me the small time mix of both words .In a time in my life, when I didn’t want to be different .I just wanted to feel and look normal like everyone else. I mean I would look at myself in the bathroom mirror everyday before class started. And all I would see is a 5’6 fifteen year old girl .Who on a good day weighed 110 and looked as though she just survived a major famine. It was a scary sight and it looked even worst when I took off my shirt. I was a canvas full of scars. (Which came from a childhood well spent climbing trees.) My elbows bore the load of my scares. With just a small scar being above my belly button .It was small scar among an even larger canvas of white that made contributed to this canvas of colors. I looked white but India would find its way in me and it did along the jet black color of my hair. I didn’t like my hair color. But there was nothing I would do. Until I reached that point in my life like all teenagers do .When I started to change this canvas. And when I did world forever change.
When I first got to school I thought it would never end. I woke up that day and after going over what I would wear. Settled on a red tang top and blue skirt .I hated this style but it was the middle of August and it was blistering hot. No one to my knowledge walked to school in that kind of heat. But I didn’t know that. So I walked it to school. The heat killed the walk. Every step I took felt as though maybe 10 other steps were pushing me behind. By the time I arrived to school. I felt as though I had just crossed the desert. I felt sweaty and dirty but apparently didn’t give that impression to a few boys who seemed to be lobbying around the front of the school. They called out hey beautiful sit right hear. They were obviously losers. After calling out to me they called out to a group of other girls who were walking together. It seemed as though they were in there own little world. This didn’t surprise me. I pulled out my schedule and got lost in the crowd. It was hard finding my classroom numbers and when I would get lost I would ask someone who would than point me the right way. This process took place a series of times before I found a way to memorize the numbers by heart. I got the back seats in most of classes because of this mix up. I hated doing the walk to the back seat. It was embarrassing as you walked past row to row of students. As you watched as some students read into there book. While other student’s seemed to turn around because you were the only girl who wore a skirt to school. The school was filled with students. Yet why did I than sit by myself. I couldn’t bear not knowing anyone and when school was over I would walk home by myself. Until that is I met Abby.
Abby Page was part of the clique that had ignored since I first got to school. She had narrowly bumped into me in school and always seemed to point at me. One day after my chemistry class she came up to me and started speaking to me. I was shocked and convinced she wanted something. What do you want Abby I called out to her as I walked to my locker? “Nothing your so stuff. All I wanted to say hi.” I responded hesitantly back Hi and than walked away I couldn’t shake this girl. She kept on talking to me. Till I gave her number and said call me at my house. I’ll be open to talk than. When I got home the first person to call me was Abby. She talked about what it felt like to be popular and attractive and how she couldn’t decide if she would go shopping or not. I pretended to care. But I didn’t. She kept up this way. Until I asked what do you want Abby. She than mentioned that she noticed that I sat alone and that maybe if I wanted to I could sit with her. I agreed to it and by the next lunch period. I was sitting at her table. Her friends were nice and we have fun doing you know what girls do. Playing with boy’s heads, running around class, swapping homework. O it was fun. When I got home Abby called again and this time after being more open to her let her into my life. It was fun and since I had started a friendship with her in school. I drew down the protective shield I had and let her into my world. Which when the changes in me started happening.
School would change me. I believed I would be better; I wouldn’t follow the popular crowd. But by mid October things had changed. It was a subtle change. That occurred slowly in me. My mother seemed to be the first to notice. Starting first with the way I walked home. She said I walked like a flirt and I said get a mirror. I wasn’t in the mood to fight that day. So I walked over to my room and glanced out my window. We’re outside along my fence stood Abby Page. In her boot cut jeans and halter-top .She looked like a teenage Barbie doll. If they’re ever was one in her soft wavy daisy yellow hair and fair skin. Freckles peppered her face in an almost abstract kind of beauty. Her legs were arms were curvy, which gave her an almost seductive kind of appeal. When she would place her hands on her hips and her chest would gallantly pop out. There was no question she was every males teenage dream. But she was also quite ditsy at times when she was around boys. She would play the innocent Juliet who just wanted love. Except that she played this line with over and over with millions of Romeos. So I wasn’t surprise to watch as she talked to some boy. Who had blue eyes and a cute smile .He gave her a piece of paper and she giggled and walked right back into her house. After which I didn’t see her till 10 pm at night. I had been reading Jane Austin on the top of the roof. When she appeared on the roof to talk to me .She walked over to me and asked about how long I had been here and what school I attended. She even was surprised to know that we were in the same to which she than placed her arm around my shoulder and said. I’m going to help you become someone.
She was right. When I first entered that school .I was the girl who got lost in the hallways and now I felt as thought I owned these hallways. By the beginning of November I had been introduced to all of Abby’s friends including a girl named Emma. Emma like me didn’t quite fit in either. She was a brunette and carried a lot more weight than all of us. Along with that she was quite tall for a girl and with the weight on she looked a little fat. She was also the only one from among us who was a minority. She came from Pittsburg. Which wasn’t as far away from New York as all these other girls were from? To me she was as much of a real New Yorker as I. I took comfort in that. This came in handy when Abby and I had our first fight. It was over a boy named Jason. Jason and I had been dating for a solid month. Which had in the time of a month made me happier .Jason went to a school about seven blocks north of my high school. He had brown eyes and soft light velvet hair. He was tall and muscular. Yet weak for my touch .When she and I first met. I had been with Abby at the library carrying in the books. When Abby bumped into Jason .He had a latte in his hand .Which ended up with his spilling all over his white crew neck t-shirt. He was real nice about it. He spoke to Abby who from the look of the way she batted her eyes was interested in Jason. To her surprise Jason asked about me instead. He gave me his number and called days latter. It was during my soccer class practice with Abby .Which didn’t fly well with Abby. Abby wasn’t use to not receiving attention. I think she believed that she was the one that got me were I stood. A few times we even joked about it. But as the school year go on. I started to notice that Abby really felt that. She would walk with me to the store and say can I borrow a dollar. You owe me for where you are. I didn’t like this so I stopped talking to her. She didn’t seem to mind either. When she would pass me at lunchtime .She would say are you done with this hissy fit, so you could pay me what you owe to me. Since Abby had been a friend to me I opted to instead talk to Emma. Emma and I got close and soon Emma started even to invite me to her table for lunch. It was during those times while sitting at Emma’s table that I came to realize how Emma treated people. She always had a word to stay. And I wondered if in the middle of going from a regular girl to a popular girl that the days of my reign as a popular girl would come to an end. The days were marked. Especially after a vicious rumor hit the ears of Abby that I was playing games with Jason. Jason I new wouldn’t take it easily. So I sought to defend my title. After doing her research Abby was ready to attack. She approached while I was on my roof and approached me. Her horns ready she looked at me and said. This is over you either pick him or me. I said him and with the tern a few words I was on Abby Page’s dead list. It therefore wasn’t a surprise when while walking to school Abby tried to beat me up. She apparently wasn’t smart because she tried to punch me in front of a police station. The police saw what was happening and came out batons in there hands. “Let her go” called out cop. But it was too late. Emotionally I was dead. The cops let me into the station and I sobbed my tears away. A few weeks later I would fine myself in the final fight that would end anger for this popular group of girls and finally let me redeem myself.
It was during my walk to school that I would experience my last conflict and finally end my guilt. I hadn’t been talking to Emma in a while. I had defended a friend of whom Emma thought was stupid. I took my friend in my arms and said don’t worry. But this clearly had crossed the line with Emma. She sought to take me down and figured that with Abby already mad she would do a real take down. As I walked home from I didn’t realize how that they would get me till while walking on the road home to school. A car passed me. Hey loser called one of the girls from school you like starting things with people don’t you. I looked at the car a 4 by 4 jeep. Where Abby and Emma were. They had eggs in there hands and within a few minutes had engulfed me in eggs. Fear quickly emerged and I pulled up a fight. But my fight was over and I was done fighting. I gave in to the wound and like frost bite to skin. I let my physical wounds take the death of my old skin, my old life .It hurt a lot and as I saw the passengers in the car laugh at me. I felt even worst. The car slowed down and when I did. Emma pulled out her fist and black eye. I was in excruciating pain. The blow knocked me out and I felt down to the floor. They stopped the car and I blanked out. A local car that had scene what was happening pulled out and the man inside pulled me out. He held his fist in the air and said if you hit her again. I will knock you all out. After which he pulled me and said this is not how you want to start your high school carrier. He took my hand and I sat in his car. He let me cry on his sleeve as I placed together the pieces of my life.
I grabbed my books and looked down the hallway. My days here were done. It’s not as empty as I remember it. But than again had changed since I first entered this place. I walked down the stairs to my mom who was holding congratulation’s sign. She had aged a lot. I put her through a lot and the stressed had aged her. Yet as I left I couldn’t help but feel proud. We had made it and nothing would ever change our memories that we had made it. I entered the car and hit the road home. This time with no one out to hurt me but the bright future of a sunset setting over my house.
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